Have I fallen out of love? Am I in love? Am i just used to being with him? Am I ready to move on? What are some questions I need to ask myself?
I am really glad you are looking at this from the perspective of things to ask yourself and not making it about the person. These are some questions I asked myself when I was at a pivotal point with my ex a few years back:
- What would my life look like if I stayed with this person?
- What would my life looked like if I moved on?
Obviously, radically honest is required on your part. No wishful thinking. A realistic look at your life with or without this person in it.
What I found to be the case in my relationship was that our visions for the future were not lining up. Although I thought they did in the beginning, over time things change and the life of a relationship may end up running its course. OR parts of your visions line up, but not the parts that are high up on the priority or values list!
The other thing that I did at the time was write up a statement of my Ideal Relationship. Here is the most important piece of that exercise: Envision and write out the scenario of your ideal relationship with no particular person in mind, simply your heart’s desire when it comes to a partnership.
In my opinion, it is not as much about “Am I still in love with this person or not?” because emotions, like the tide, come and go. You may feel super head over heels for someone and then get confronted with some challenging situations. Those situations will test your commitment, your resolve, your love. They will ultimately either bring you closer together or farther apart, and impact your joint vision of the future.
If you focus on your ultimate vision for life and love, it will help you rise above the emotional arena for a bit. And from that vantage point, you can see if this person is aligned with your goals.
The two things I recommended will help you get in touch with your vision. Start there and see what comes up for you during this inquiry. As always, let me know how it goes and if you need further support.
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As a thank you, you will get a surprise from me as well … an in-depth worksheet where you list out your ideal partner and relationship. When you are clear, they appear…It works like magic I tell ya. XO