There is a fine line between dreaming up your ideal partner and living in the fantasy that they will be perfect and your relationship will be perfect.
In this video, I talk about some of those distinctions and how to be powerful in your choices! *For video transcription, see below.
I wanted to talk about the fine line between fantasy and dreams. I was having dinner with really good girlfriend of mine the other day and I started talking about relationships (obviously).
I was thinking about this concept of how do you know when your dreams are just totally unrealistic. Because as I have learned, relationships aren’t easy. They take effort. There’s stuff that we have to deal with, our childhood shit comes up, then there is learning the communication stuff.
It’s never perfect. Relationships are not perfect. They are works in progress and I feel they evolve over time.
So I started to realize that there’s a distinction between asking for everything we want, which i think is a beautiful thing to do … to know what you want and to really strive for having all the things that you want, and then the flip side which is realizing you are going to deal with an imperfect person … and lord knows all of us have imperfections.
I talked about that piece in one of my other blog posts where I filmed a video about this fear that we have to be seen as imperfect.
Given all of that, it just becomes a choice. Choosing someone that’s perfect for us, knowing they have imperfections themselves. When we realize that, we can then consciously choose the imperfections, along with the perfections of a person. They are going to have both, just like we do.
Coming from that choice is a much more empowered place. From this vantage point, I realize I get to love my partner with all of that stuff … the imperfections and the perfections.
You can still get everything you want (in your ideal relationship) and know that that person is perfect for YOU, with (and even because of) their imperfections.
Something to think about as you’re thinking about what you want in a relationship and dreaming for everything you want.
I hope this serves as a reminder for being grounded and not going off into fantasy land by realizing the person you end up with still is going to have their own imperfections too and this is something you want to choose.
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